Christmas Evil

 Christmas Evil - also known with its original title, You Better Watch Out- is a relatively popular no-budget holiday slasher from 1980. It came out six months after the first Friday the 13th (which is mentioned in this movie's poster), so it's a pretty early entry in the 80's slasher phenomenon that Halloween started. It's also the first murdering Santa movie that I know of.
 It's... kind of a slog.

 Unlike Friday the 13th, this is a 'classy', more psychological take on the slasher formula, one that keeps a tight focus on the slasher rather than follow the victims. Don't get me wrong, it's exploitative as hell, and none of the characters are even remotely plausible - but it does try.

A truly amazing scene. Shame they couldn't work pitchforks in, somehow.

 Our slasher is one Harry Stadling (Brandon Maggart), who has the misfortune to walk into his father, in full Santa Claus getup, going down on his mother. Well, at least doing some mild groping with his head in the general vicinity of her crotch area, it's a weird, overtly long scene (complete with unsexy sexy music).

 So of course he'll grow up to be a santa-obsessed murderer, that's how these things work.

 As an adult he sleeps in Santa pyjamas, has Christmas decorations and music up by Thanksgiving, and, more worryingly, keeps tabs on all the neighbourhood kids and carefully notes down if they're being nice or naughty in a library of large notebooks (his handwriting is amazing!). There's one kid in particular he sees looking at porn mags, and he treats him like a personal nemesis, calling out his name like a superhero angrily screaming a villain's name: 'Moooooossss!' It's pretty funny.

 Keeping on with the theming, Harry works at a toy factory - it's a desk job, but he misses being in the production line, where he was close to the toys. Being an introvert and more than a bit of a weirdo, he gets disrespected and taken advantage of on a regular basis. And you know what that means.

 But 'what that means' is a little more nuanced than you'd expect. Basically, he does get fed up, but not necessarily with the abuse. it's mostly the hypocrisy and people's flippant attitude to a holiday he considers magical that enrages him. He doesn't embark in a rampage; Rather, he goes full loon and convinces himself he's the real Santa. So he dons a full Santa Claus costume, loads up on toys, and actually does some real good, and as it happens kids love him. Except Moss, but fuck that kid, he's naughty.
 Harry has less luck with adults. So when a trio of idiots bully him outside a church, he snaps and kills them. As the killer santa news spread out, he gets into more and more trouble - even with his little brother (Jeffrey DeMunn)- and after some chases things build up to a cute, surrealist ending.

 There's an undeniable sense of humor running through the film - it's dead serious on the surface, but also features a 'santa can't get through the chimney' gag and a hilarious scene where the police grab a bunch of people in Santa suits and put them in a line up. The problem is that the script is so inept on some respects, and the humor so deadpan, that it's hard to know whether, say, a random parent pulling a switchblade on Santa, or a mob -complete with torches- running amok hungry for Santa's blood, was intended to be funny or is just part of the movie's weird sensibilities. I'm inclined to give writer/director Lewis Jackson the benefit of the doubt here and say it's both. In any case, it made me laugh, and the ridiculous nature of, say, Harry's children monitoring are part of the film's appeal.

 That's not to say the script is good, though - many of the conversations are laughable, and so are most of the performances. Maggart comes closest to transcending the material, trying to inhabit his character as fully as possible and succeeding at making him at least a little relatable and entertaining to watch. But he also at one point shakes his fist and literally says 'grrrrrr', so... what are you going to do.
 The movie's minuscule budget definitely doesn't do it any favours either, as scenes where not much happens painfully stretch out to pad out the runtime. Some of them are fun in concept, like when Santa gets roped into a Christmas party and dances to entertain the crowd (and does a little speech for the children), but they absolutely overstay their welcome. It's not a great-looking movie, but it does have some great-looking scenes; Argentinian DP Ricardo Aronovich's CV included movies by Costa-Gavras, Resnais and Moreau by the time this was made.

 Meanwhile, the slasher action is kept to a bare minimum. The prosthetics are very cheap and only shown as quick flashes, but there's a pretty effective eye-stabbing and some axe murdering as well, all very bloody. Someone gets killed with a Christmas ornament too, so there's that holiday tradition covered. Don't get excited, though - again, it's a tiny (if important) part of the movie.

 I'd be lying if I said it didn't often bore me to tears, but it was kind of interesting, and pretty funny to boot. I'm happy I watched it.