The Terminal

I really would like to review the movie. Really. But after watching the first ten minutes, well, Everquest 2 seemed so much more interesting...
So I mostly absorbed it by osmosis. The premise has a lot of potential; unfortunately, Mr. Spielberg got to direct it, in his full populist mode- the same one mode that fucked up the otherwise excellent AI (think the last 10 minutes). What could have been Kafka-esque, or at least surrealist comedy, becomes an extremely predictable, uninteresting mess of half baked contrivances and scenes genetically engineered to warm the hearts of the lowest common denominator.
Let me illustrate. As I said, I pretty much tuned out pretty close to the beginning. This scene was the culprit: In what has to be one of the clumsiest exposition setpieces in recent memory, the bad guy callously eats his lunch while delivering terrible news, while our foreigner hero misunderstands comically and good-naturedly, and the news themselves are broken down so that anyone who might be able to enjoy this movie understands them... as they say around here, Bollocks! This scene alone is incitation enough to drive a nine iron straight into Spielbergs balls. Insulting, smug and unnecessary. And what the hell did women do to him? His denunciation of them all as backstabbing bitches is not a first in his work, but is disturbingly psychotic in a movie that is all rounded edges and tidy resolutions.
Anyhow, this movie doesn't deserve even these few words. It's a mercenary piece of shit with no redeeming qualities and no value whatsoever. Fuck you, Spielberg. Blow shit up good, or stay the hell away from me.